Saturday, March 3, 2012

A Conversation With An Ex Boyfriend

Original Party Foul.

Well congratu-fuckin-lations. You have managed to accomplish EVERYTHING I've asked you to do over the last TWO YEARS in 3 months. You've moved out of your parents home and into your own apartment in Carp, you are now taking you job and career more seriously, and now you are going out, being social and having fun. Well I'm so happy you decided to do it now as opposed to any other fucking time that we were together.

What's that you say? You have a new girlfriend? She sounds like a real peach. Of course I would have been a peach too if say, you did any of the above mentioned things when we were together. I'm so glad she "gets you" and that she doesn't "stress you." I wouldn't have been a nagging bitch either if you lived on your own, paid for ANYTHING, and were generally a fun person to be around. Funny how when you start to act like an adult and take care of your shit that the women around you act so fucking pleasant. Well have fun with Charlotte (the cool laid back girl who doesn't nag you because now you're so fucking responsible). Just for kicks, why don't you revert to your old self and see how cool Charlotte is in about one month? I do love science experiments.

Great talking with you!



    What's he going to say? Really?!

    Is he going to say "she's alright but she kinda sucks in bed and talking to you makes me miss you and I wish I had got my shit together when you were still here and I feel bad for putting you through all that - losing you really helped put things in perspective. I'm sorry"

    Puh-lease. If he was THAT stand up of a guy to be able to articulate that and share that with you honestly, you would still be with him.

    But he's NOT. So let Charlotte have him. The honeymoon will fade. Or they will be a good match and all that shows you is he's good enough for her - but not good enough for you.

  2. Replies
    1. I was so mad that I was literally shaking. I came home, cleaned my entire apartment, swept my yard, and took a cold shower and was STILL shaking mad. Right now, I hate everybody.

  3. Being responsible will get old and he will be back to his "normal" self soon. And then Charlotte will have to deal with him and not you :) I love to laugh at my exes girlfriend. Have fun with that one girl. That's why I got rid of him.

    1. Nice Jamie! It's true. He will eventually revert back. They always do!!! ;)