Thursday, March 8, 2012

I'm With Stupid

So I'm taking
Pish Posh Blog up on her Thursday Get Fit Challenge thingy. Basically the deal is that I'm supposed to make a goal and write about it every Thursday. My goal is to stop being stupid. Seriously, that's my goal.

I am so stupid in so many ways.

The first way I'm stupid is I let the little things get me. For instance, I'm pissed off right now. My crazy ass alcoholic of a neighbor actually had the nerve to ask me to not slam the laundry room door. Yes I did slam it. The wind caught the door and I ended up slamming it on accident. I never do that and I never even use the laundry room. I usually have some lady named Lourdes do my laundry. I would understand confronting me if this was a normal behavior of mine, running around slamming laundry room doors. But it's not!!! Anyways, this is all coming from the alcoholic who is CONSTANTLY fighting and screaming with her live-in boyfriend.

The second way I'm stupid is I am quite literally stupid. Honestly, there are so many simple things that I suck at. Simple things like reading time, 5th grade math, and world capitals. You think I would have sat down at one point and educated myself. I do have the internet an all. But I don't. I watch re-runs and I eat Flammin' Hot Cheetos. The thing that is bothering me most of all is that I have a desire to learn Spanish since BOTH my parents are fluent. My dad even bought me Rosetta Stone. I only try to do the program after consuming a gallon of wine and end up falling asleep with the ear phones on. If I was a smart person, I would actually study and follow the program and find some handsome Spaniard to take me out to dinner and practice my conversational Spanish with.

The third way I'm stupid is with boys. If you have read my blog at all, you would know this. I've been running around like an 8th grade girl. I have been boy crazy and I don't like it. I'm gonna cut that out. And I just behave like a weirdo in general. If I like a boy I insist on paying on a date, and if I don't like him, I let him treat me. Shouldn't I do the opposite??? I also make up tons of excuses for their weird behaviors, then end up dating grown babies, train them and they usually break up with me and find someone else to be with now that they are all fixed. Need an example? Read A Conversation With An Ex Boyfriend.

The last way I'm stupid is with my health. I eat like shit, drink too much, sleep too little, and never exercise. 'Nuff said. So to combat being fat and stupid, I hired a personal trainer. He works at the same gym my ex boyfriend works at so I might remain stupid. However, it is literally the only gym in town.

Anyways, how do I work against all this stupid? Any suggestions?? Comment away!



  1. Okay before I even finish reading your post I'm going to tell you that I will no longer drink wine while reading your post. When I got to the line "my goal is to stop being stupid" for some reason I laughed out loud and sprayed my computer with wine stuffs.

    Okay, carry on

  2. Oh my gosh so much stupid to deal with! You left out "I'm so stupid I think Nick Lachey is dreamy" what about THAT part huh?

    Anyway - okay alcoholic Sid and Nancy couple. The lady is just taking her sad life out on you. She probably has a RAGING hangover and wants to yell at the hot little neighbor with the mustache to make herself look better. She's also probably jealous at your decorating ability because her apartment probably looks like this -
    (note that that was NOT hurricane damage - the hurricane probably saw that shit and went DAMMMMMM!)

    Anyway okay, so 1 down. Okay so that other stuff like math and cheetos, that makes you loveable not stupid. However, I feel you on the Spanish thing. We should both be fluent in Spanish, it's kind of embarrassing and the only cure for it is to both move to Argentina and date soccer players, marry them, have beautiful babies, divorce them, take their money, and return to the states with pretty babies and spanish fluency. Check.

    Next, I have nothing to say there. I am stupid with boys too. One thing you could do is pretend like you are a princess and you're not allowed to date idiots who are less than you because otherwise the Queen will bitch-slap you. Don't date anyone your daughter would be embarrassed by. How's about that?

    Finally, let's open a restaurant and have your sisters design it with us and we can cook and learn Spanish and take a lot of vacations. That is not stupid at all right?


    1. Ugh I want the life you suggest! YES. Let's run away to Argentina and date the soccer players and have babies and learn to cook foods and speak the spanish!!!! Pretty Please!!!

    2. Also, WTF is with that apartment? DAaaaaaammmmmm.

  3. First off, you are probably nowhere near as bad as you perceive yourself to be. You know, the whole "we are our own worst critics" saying.

    However, if you do want to tackle these things, you can't overload yourself. No one change change everything at once.

    Pick one to take on. For instance, learn Spanish. Go after it and actually do it. Then tackle something else. Plus, doing that one thing may make you feel better about yourself and realize some of your concerns aren't as bad as you thought.

    1. That's actually great advice. I should pick up the spanish!! :)

  4. I don't have a good response, but at least you know what you want to change. Sucks that the ex is at the gym. You could take your workouts outside :D

    P.S. Your neighbour sounds like a real prize :)

    1. Oh man! You have NO idea about the neighbor! Their last fight was about how she caught him watching porn. Details NO ONE ever needs to know.

  5. Your goal made me chuckle a little because I often feel stupid too. I think these are admirable goals and I am looking forward to hearing how you takled themm